Bizarre Occurances Chapter 12
By Dino Pollard
Barret relaxed into the couch in Clouds Villa at Costa del Sol.
Ahhhh, he began. Dis is the life.
Yep-yep, Yuffie agreed. She looked out the window. Hmm... maybe Ill go check out that Materia Shop over there. Be back later!! Dont wait up!!!
We wont!! Cait shouted to her as she ran out the door.
BITE ME, CAT!!! she called back to him. He chuckled.
Cid reclined in a chair and lit a cigarette. Red wrinkled his nose in disgust.
Cid, dont you think you should quit those awful things? he asked. They arent very good for you.
Mind your own damn business, Cid spat. Why dont you go chase your tail or lick your balls or something?
Im no dog, Red replied.
Yeah, and Im not a pilot, Cid said. Red walked away.
Sephiroth looked out the window at Meteor.
Its staring us in the face, Vincent said. Its like a shadow looming over us. A constant reminder of the impending doom.
I was just thinking the same thing, Sephiroth replied. Strange in a way.
What do you mean? Vincent asked.
Meteor is a force of destruction, Sephiroth answered. Yet in some strange way, its almost beautiful.
Youve got a point there, Vincent agreed. Its like the setting or rising of the sun. Although this time, the sun will set forever.
Unless we stop it, Sephiroth noted. Vincent nodded. They looked out at the ocean. Cloud, Tifa and Aeris were all fooling around in the water. Vincent remembered what it was like to do things like that with Lucrecia.
I havent had this much fun in years!! Aeris exclaimed as she splashed Tifa.
Hey, watch it!! Tifa protested. Cloud, help!!
Cloud picked up Aeris.
Now youre gonna get it!! he shouted, lifting Aeris over his head, prepared to dunk her.
NO!!! STOP!!! she squealed. Cloud dunked her into the water and let her come up for air. She was laughing uncontrollably as was Tifa.
YOU JERK!!! she exclaimed between bursts of laughter.
Now we see how Cloud Strife picks up women!! Tifa said.
Thats right, Cloud said, running over to her. I pick them up like--THIS!!! He sweeped a hand behind her knees, causing her to fall in his arms.
Whoa!! Tifa exclaimed. She looked into his eyes. Well Mr. Strife. Now what do you plan to do with me?
This, he said as he fell back into the water, pulling her in behind him. Aeris fell to her knees in laughter. When the two came up for air, they were laughing as well.
Im glad Tifa came up with the idea of us coming out here to relax, Aeris said.
Me too, Tifa replied. Besides, Cloud really needs to loosen up. Aeris giggled. Cloud looked at Tifa, who winked at him.
Well Im just glad to be back as your leader, Cloud said.
We all are Cloud, Aeris replied. You know, Sephiroth was doing a pretty good job. He even saved most of the people in Mideel.
There was an awkward silence at the mention of Sephiroth being a hero.
Hey, Im getting kind of hungry, Tifa broke in, changing the subject. What say we go back to the Villa and get something to eat? Maybe watch some TV?
Cloud and Aeris nodded.
Damn Cloud!! Cid said as the trio walked in. Most guys have trouble getting one girl. Yet you get two!! Aeris and Tifa blushed.
OoOoOoOo!!! Yuffie said sarcastically. Clouds havin a menage a tois with Aeris and Tifa!!
Dont you have some pukin ta do? Barret asked her. Yuffie glared at him.
Well, now what do we do? Cid asked lighting a cigarette.
Cid, you should really quit those, Red told him.
Shit, didnt we already talk about this?!? Cid asked.
Cid quitting smoking? Yuffie broke in. She laughed. Probably wont make it. Old men have a hard time breakin habits. Its been proven!!
You sayin Im old? Cid asked.
If the orthopedic shoe fits, Yuffie replied. I bet you couldnt last five minutes without lighting up.
Bet you couldnt go without stealing something, Cid countered.
Care to make it interesting? Yuffie asked.
How much ya got, bitch? Cid asked.
500 gil, Yuffie replied.
Youre on, Cid said. If you steal, I win. If I smoke, you win.
Prepare to lose 500 gil, Yuffie said, dropping several bills on the table. Old man.
Cid took the pack of cigarettes from his goggles and dropped them on the table along with 500 gil. Red grinned. No more foul-smelling smoke in the Highwind or in the hotel rooms.
After dinner, Cloud stood to address the team.
Okay, heres whats been happening so far, he began. Bizarro-Sephiroth is protected by that barrier and Meteor has been summoned. Tsunami has the Shin-Ra distracted. And we have no idea what the hell we should do. Any suggestions?
I have one.
All the heads turned to the chair at the foot of the table. Sephiroth stood.
Centuries ago, in the time of mages and knights, there was a Summon Spell experienced mages used called Knights of the Round. It is more powerful than any weapon currently in creation, Sephiroth said. However, when Materia came into use, mages became much more difficult to find. But there is a rumor that Knights of the Round also has a Materia orb. There is only one orb, though. And we wont find it in any Reactors.
Then we should be confident that the Shin-Ra cant reach it, Vincent said.
Yes, Sephiroth replied. If the orb exists, it would most likely be on an uninhabited island just south of here.
I heard about some guy who used that spell during the war, Cid said.
True, Sephiroth said. The mans name is Knolan.
Knolan? Barret asked. Who da hell is that?
Knolan was formally the Head of Shin-Ras Weapons Development, Vincent replied. He was a mage as well.
So then what happened to him? Aeris asked.
About nine years ago, he quit the Shin-Ra for reasons unknown, Sephiroth answered. But not before he created the only war golem known as Calibretto, a deciding factor in the war against Wutai.
He created the thing that destroyed Wutai?!?! Yuffie exclaimed. Lets kill him!!!
Calm down, Yuffie, Cloud said. If Knolan is alive or not doesnt matter. We need to find this Knights of the Round. So lets all get our stuff together and board the Highwind. We better get this Knights of the Round before some Materia hunter does.
With Sephiroths help and the Highwinds own navigational computers, the trip to the unnamed island didnt take long. Once the team unboarded, they began a search for the Materia.
Where do you think it might be? Red asked.
Im not sure... Cloud replied.
HALT!!! someone ordered. The team turned to see a goblin holding a bow and arrow.
Who da hell are you? Barret asked.
This is MY island!!! the goblin replied. And youre trespassing!! Leave now or suffer th--ACK!!! He fell back in pain as an arrow struck his chest.
YOUR island? Yuffie asked. Youre a goblin!! I bet you dont even have any legal--oh, nevermind.
How many times do I have to tell you goblins? a man asked. This island is under the protection of Baakusa!!! An elf-like creature dropped down from a nearby tree. He held a bow in his hand with a sword and shield held on his back.
Gawah!?! Cait exclaimed.
Now who the hell are YOU?!? Barret asked Baakusa.
Ahh, more crazy shit, Cid said. Fancy name, asshole!!
Oh geez, Cloud said as he put a hand on his head.
Hoo-boy, Yuffie began. ANOTHER freak!!
I apologize for any inconvenience, Baakusa said. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Baakusa, the guardian of this island.
We come seeking a certain Materia, Red said. We mean you no harm.
So you seek out the Ultimate Summon Spell, correct? Baakusa asked.
Yeah, Cloud replied. Knights of the Round.
Oh? Baakusa said. I thought you were looking for the Ultimate Summon.
Isnt that it? Aeris asked.
Ha ha ha!! Baakusa laughed. No, no. Knights of the Round is very powerful, but nowhere near as powerful as the Ultimate Summon.
What is the Ultimate Summon? Red asked. Could you explain it?
I have never actually seen it performed, Baakusa replied. But no Materia exists for it.
Dang, Yuffie said.
Ultimate Summons... Knights of the Round... this elf-lookin shithead... Cid said. Im in desperate need of a cig.
Uh-uh-uh, Yuffie chimed. Remember the bet!!
I picked a helluva day to quit smoking, Cid muttered.
We still want the Knights of the Round, Cloud said. We need all the help we can get.
So how do we find the Ultimate Summon if there is no Materia for it? Vincent asked.
It can only be mastered by a mage who has mastered all other spells, Baakusa replied. WITHOUT Materia. Now why do you seek Knights of the Round?
To save the Planet and to stop a great evil, Sephiroth replied.
The Planet? Ahh yes. The Ultimate Destructive Magic. I sensed a great disturbance, Baakusa said. And you also seek to stop The Crisis From The Sky.
YEAH!! Yuffie said. Youre good!!! You should be one of those Psychic Friends People!!
By the way, Baakusa began. Who are you all?
Avalanche, Cloud replied.
Dats right!! Barret said. First we was gonna stop Shin-Ra, den Sephiroth, den Bizarro-Sephiroth. den---
Long story, Yuffie broke in, cutting Barret off. Dont ask.
Shin-Ra? Baakusa asked. What is Shin-Ra?
Damn man!! Barret exclaimed. Where da hell have you been livin? A deserted island?
Yes, Baakusa replied.
Oh, Barret said. Heh, sorry bout dat.
Shin-Ra Inc. Cloud said. Theyre a corperation that pretty much runs the world. For years theyve been draining the Planet of Lifestream and manufacturing it. We started out as a rebellion against them. But once we discovered a bigger crisis for the planet--namely Jenova or Crisis From The Sky as you call it--we nearly forgot about the Shin-Ra. But we need all the help we can get. Why dont you join us?
I dont think so, Baakusa replied. My duty is to this island.
If Meteor hits you wont HAVE a fuckin island!! Cid cursed.
Wait, here, Baakusa said. He handed Cloud a small orb with the Knights of the Round symbol
Thanks, Cloud said. He turned to the rest of Avalanche. Lets get going.
Wait a minute Baakusa, Sephiroth said. You said a mage needed to master ALL spells to be able to master the Ultimate Summon?
Yes, Baakusa replied.
Knolan! Sephiroth exclaimed. Knolan has mastered all the spells!!
One problem, Sephiroth, Cloud said. Knolan hasnt been seen or heard from in years. For all we know, hes probably dead.
Ummm, Cloud, Cait broke in. Thats not all true...
What? Yuffie asked. Which part?
Knolan did vanish, Cait began. But the Shin-Ra think he might be alive on an island in the northwest.
Then we find Knolan, Cloud said.
Im going with you, Baakusa said. If this Knolan is as powerful as you say, then I have to meet
ACK!! Yuffie exclaimed. Why do we pick up every strange person we meet? First the cat, then the vampire, then the maniac, then the smoker, then all those other guys and now an ELF!!! A FRIGGIN ELF!!!!
No restrictions apply, child, Red said. Just as long as you hate the Shin-Ra or wish to save the Planet.
Yeah, Barret agreed. Why da hell do ya think we picked you up?
H-hey!! Yuffie protested.
Do you have a ship worthy enough of travelling by sea?
Sea? Cid asked. Who the fuck needs to go by see when we can go by air?!? He pointed to the Highwind.
I see... Baakusa said. Remnants of Goug.
Goug? the team asked in unison.
Yes, Baakusa replied. Goug Machine City. It existed during a period in time known as the mechanical age.
No, you got it confused, Cid said. See, thats the HIGHWIND!! Its not from Goug. Its the HIGHWIND!!
The mechanical age was a period in time when ships travelled by air, Baakusa said. Just like your Highwind. Oh, and I dont appreciate your sarcasm.
We can talk more about the Highwind on the way to the island, Cloud said.
Baakusa walked into the cockpit and his eyes widened in shock.
Incredible.... he began. Never in my wildest dreams....
See? Cid asked, motioning to their new ally. Now why cant all of you shitheads look that enthusiastic?
Because Im not... ulp!! Yuffie exclaimed. She clutched her stomach. Im gonna be in the bathroom.
It isnt much, Baak, Cait said. I have more technology in my little finger.
Keep dreamin, cat, Cid snapped.
Hey, were coming up to the island!! Aeris exclaimed.
Land us towards the center, Cloud ordered.
You heard the man!! Cid said to the pilot.
Yes sir, the pilot replied. He landed the Highwind in a clearing in the center.
Once the team gathered outside the ship, Cloud examined the new surroundings.
We should probably split up, Cloud suggested. We can cover more ground that way.
Did you hear that? Vincent asked. A low rumbling, almost like a growl...
The ground is shaking!! Sephiroth exclaimed.
Suddenly, a huge monster emerged from the water!!
SH----------IT!!!!! Cid cursed.
Run, Baakusa ordered as he drew his sword and shield.
But-- Cloud began to protest.
Just DO IT!!! Baakusa shouted. Go find this Knolan. Ill be right behind you!!
We should do what he says, Red said. He is a very powerful warrior, and a very wise one at that.
Reds right, Cloud, Aeris said. Come on!!
Get off yer slow-movin ass Cloud!! Barret exclaimed.
Yeah, Cloud said. The team began to run away from the creature while Baakusa tried to fight it off.
Come on beast!! he taunted. Im ready for you!!! He leapt at the monster and slashed it with his sword. The monster barely noticed.
Damn, he said. He turned and ran after Avalanche with the monster following.
Cloud led the team through the forests. He turned his head to see if everyone was still with him. They were. But now Baakusa was running as well, with the monster in pursuit!!
This is NOT what I had in mind for a relaxing vacation!! Tifa said, running beside him.
I know what you mean, Cloud replied. Look, a hut!!
Do you think its Knolan? she asked.
Cloud came to a dead stop a few feet from the hut. The rest of the team stopped as well, as did the monster. The sound of a door creaking open was heard. They all turned to see a man walking towards them. He was an elderly man who was bald except for a ponytail sticking out of the back of his head. He had a fairly large goatee as well as a strange outfit and tiny spectacles.
Grrrr, he said. He walked over to the monster. STOP SCARING AWAY OUR GUESTS!!! HAVENT I TAUGHT YOU BETTER THAN THAT?!?
The monster hung its head and walked off. It almost sounded as if the creature was... whimpering?
Sorry about that, the man said. Hes always showboatin and scarin people away.
Who are you? Cloud asked.
You can call me Knolan, he responded. He looked over at Tifa and Aeris. Hel-LO!! Now I have TWO cuties visiting me!! Last time it was only one.
Last time? Sephiroth asked, raising an eyebrow.
Yep, Knolan replied. Last time four people came to visit me. A blonde bombshell, a red-head guy, a bald guy, and a guy with long black hair. They all wore blue suits.
The Turks, Vincent said.
THAT WAS IT!!! Knolan exclaimed. The leader was--TSENG!! I am on a roll!!
They know about the Ultimate Summon? Aeris asked. How did they find out?
Ultimate Summon? Knolan asked. No, they wanted me to give them the tech for war golems!! But I forgot how to.
You are the mage who has mastered Knights of the Round? Baakusa asked.
Thats me, Knolan replied.
Have you mastered the Ultimate Summon? Baakusa asked.
Ultimate Summon? Knolan repeated. He scratched his head. I dont know... Damn, things were so much easier when Jonah was here to help me remember things. But he went to look for his sons. He looked at Cloud. Hmm, you look a lot like Jonah...
Who is this Jonah? Cloud asked.
Jonah------STRIFE!!! Knolan replied. YES!! I remembered!!
Jonah Strife...? Cloud asked. My father? Hes alive?
Guess the jig is up, Cait said.
Cloud, while you were in that coma, Aeris began. We ran into a man who said he was Jonah Strife. He said you were his son. But since you had Mako Poisoning, he asked us to drop him off in Gongaga and not tell you about him right away.
He didnt want to add to your problems, Sephiroth said. So we agreed to his wishes.
Uh-oh, Knolan said. I think I just ruined a teary father-son reunion. I wonder if he found your brother...
BROTHER?!? Cloud asked. I dont have a brother!!
You do now, Knolan replied.
How is this possible? Cloud asked. Who is he?
I dont remember, Knolan replied.
Well you better START remembering old man!! Cloud shouted.
CLOUD!! Tifa exclaimed.
STOP IT!!! Aeris yelled.
Is this Jenova messing with my memories again? Cloud asked.
No, Sephiroth said. This is the truth.
Hmm? Knolan asked. He began to dart his head back and forth.
What are you doing? Cloud asked.
Are you okay? Baakusa asked.
No... Knolan said.
What is it? Red asked. Whats happening?
The Zodiac Stones.... Knolan replied. Hojo has found them.
HOJO?!? Sephiroth cursed. We need to stop him!!
But the Zodiac Stones are only legends, Red said. How could they possibly exist?
They do, Baakusa replied. Im going with you.
So am I, Knolan said. If Hojo gets his hands on the Stones, the words God help us will take on a whole new meaning.
In other words well be in deep shit, Cid said. Knolan nodded.
Then lets get moving, Cloud said. If Hojo is behind this, then theres gonna be trouble.
AUTHORS NOTE: Youre probably all curious as to who Baakusa and Knolan are, as well as what the hell are things like Goug Machine City and the Zodiac Stones from Final Fantasy Tactics doing in a Final Fantasy VII fanfic. Well, one at a time.
Baakusa was rumored to have been a secret character for FF7 who was dropped at the last minute. He was to be an imp or a goblin in the game. Instead, I made him into an elf-type being, sort of like Link from the Legend of Zelda. But dont go looking for him in the game, because hes not in there. As I said, he was dropped before his character icon was even drawn. However, from what Ive heard it turns out that Baakusa is Japanese for Boxer, as that is what some people playing the game called the goblins, because they looked like they were wearing boxing gloves. But he seems much cooler like this. And Baakusa sounds cooler than Boxer.
For those of you who read the WildStorm/DC comic book Battle Chasers by Joe Madureira, you already know who Knolan is. I thought that characters from Battle Chasers would fit in nicely with FF7. Its basically the same. Fantasy elements like magic and swordsmen combined with high technology. But I had to change some things. Instead of being a mage who was cast out for illegal practice, hes the only remaining mage who was a former Shin-Ra employee. His last creation was a war golem Calibretto (also from Battle Chasers who was just too cool not to use). I also made him forgetful and a little comedic mainly so there can be some extra comedy relief besides Yuffie and Cait Sith.
Now for why I chose references to FFT. Yes, I know it sucked, but hear me out. In FFT, Cloud was a secret character who was sucked into the past from the future. So I used the concept that the FFT world was the past to the FF7 world. Also, theres another reason I chose the FFT Zodiac Stones which will be revealed in Chapter 13 when the team faces off against Hojo and his SOLDIER escorts. And the ending will both shock and amaze you!!
Go To Chapter 13
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