The Day the Epoch Ran Out of Gas Part 6

By The Storyteller

Magus sat at the kitchen table later on, sipping at a glass of white wine he had found chilled in his refrigerator. Propping his head up on his arm thoughtfully, he began to conjure up his memories of Janice from over a decade ago.

He remembered how she always managed to make her way past the hordes of female fans to spend time with Magus and the rest, how her and Magus always were spending nights sharing the same bed, how he would tell her lies that when they got really famous they would be together, although Magus knew full well those weren't his true intentions. To him, it was all in good fun.

But Magus wasn't so stupid as a teenager, he knew exactly how to keep such events like children from happening. He always took advantage of that Mystic technology that the overworld never knew about... those small little "coverings" that he always had a good supply of. He knew there was never a time that he wouldn't be prepared, whether or not he was with Janice or one of his other fans. He could imagine, even then, that not being prepared could lead to tons of problems, in the form of babies…

But Magus remembered how he eventually became deeply depressed, knowing all of those fans weren't spending good times with him for his personality or his music, it was just for his image. And when he stopped committing those acts of sin with the hundreds of female fans, the only person he would keep around would be Janice, who was always sporting her pink bandana, never showing exactly where her bangs were on her head. She was a saucy redhead, and Magus respected her a lot… he had no feelings for her truly (the only person he could care about was himself) but she was certainly a good time when his hormones kicked in.

But he still wasn't stupid enough to be careless. He had only made that mistake once in his life, that singular being his first with the red headed woman, or any woman for that matter…

"So is she really yours?"

Lucca emerged from the hallway, and sat down at the table across from Magus. She was dressed in a pair of tan pants and a black undershirt, that of which she found in Magus's closet. Even in his junk clothes, he thought she still looked adorably cute.

"Where'd you get my clothes from?"
"Crono searched them out for me, so I could wear them after I cleaned up. And thanks for that tooth stuff…"
"Toothpaste and a toothbrush. I sincerely hope you figured out how to use it correctly…"
"Yeah… it wasn't too much to figure out."
"And the mouthwash?"
"It tasted funny and burned my throat…"
"You weren't supposed to swallow it."
"Don't worry, unless you drank the whole bottle, it isn't enough to kill you."

She fixed the ill-fitting shirt to cover her better, so the tops wouldn't fall off her shoulders, revealing anything.

"You know, you told me you wanted kids…"
"I didn't say I wanted a pre-teen. And I would want the kid to be mine…"
"Do you think there's a way to prove that she isn't yours?"
"I really can't be sure… its times like these that shows like Montel come in handy…"
"Is that a talk show?"
"Yeah, they can do paternity tests, the ultimate form of proof. But even the Mystics have no idea of how to do that…"
"The Mystics have a lot of technology that I don't know about…"
"What you saw in Ozzie's Fort was just the tip of the iceberg… there are entire cities underground that nobody knows about. And those little imps are smarter than you think… the ones you see up here are the rejects…"
"Hmm… I don't really care about the imps…"
"You should."

Magus sat back and looked at her as she rested her head in her arms upon the table. He could hear the crunches of various shards under her shoes as she adjusted her footing. Sighing, she then lifted her head and grabbed the bottle of wine, and took a deep swallow of the sweet drink. Magus was surprised at her behavior.

"There are glasses for that, you know."
"Do you want me to help you prove that she's not yours?"
"You could do that?"
"You may still be an ass for hurting a kid's feelings, but the truth should be told."
"She shouldn't be lied to."
"Fine then. I'll help you disprove her accusations if you do one thing for me."
"Anything you need."
"You show me more of that Mystic life underground."
"I still don't like you…"

* * *

Spekkio sat in yet another one of the free rooms, staring at the still broken hunk of metal that was once a toy car… that was once the Entity…

"Spekkio… deesa toy… isa reeely Entity?"
"That's what I was told…"
"Meesa confused… why Entity toy?"
"You know that gold box that the Epoch runs on? Well, it may run the Wings of Time like an engine, but it has a hidden power when kicked into gear… if you activate it, it goes through a series of calculations, figuring out what the most improbable thing is in existence… its terribly difficult to understand…"
"Spekkio talk."
"Well, okay, it's completely and totally unpredictable… oh, you'll never understand this!"
"Spekkio explain!"
"It calculates the odds of the most… improbable thing in existence within its circuits and makes it more probable… this is too much…"
"Damn it, Spekkio, talk!"
"Okay! Crono! Calm down! It basically takes the most improbable thing in the universe and makes it happen. Which could be anything. So never activate it! It turned the Entity into the toy car. Are you good with that explanation?"
"Meesa good. Deesa Entity…"
"What I don't understand is why the world hasn't stopped existing yet! If I know anything about the Entity's workings, it runs existence as we know it, and without it, everything should stop existing. So why hasn't it?"
"Maybe deesa no Entity."
"You're saying that this isn't the Entity? You don't even understand the physics of this, you can't make such an accusation…"

A sudden call came from outside.

"Crono! Are you going to help or what?" called Marle
"Marle's calling for you to go help clean up the mess in the other room…"
"Meesa go. Talk later."

Crono left the room, as Spekkio sat and played with the hunk of the car. Suddenly going over the conversation, he noticed that Crono happened so slip slightly out of his accent…

* * *

"Now if I remember anything correctly, back in Zeal, you, as Janus, didn't have big pointed ears."
"No, they came over time… it's a funny story, really… I saw Flea back when I first came, and I told him his ears looked funny, and he put the curse on me, and since then, my ears have grown… but I grew fond of them… they-"
"So it was a curse that made your ears so big and pointy."
"A curse… that shouldn't affect your genealogy."
"I'm a guy. I don't need gynecology."
"No, genealogy… genetics. It doesn't affect your nuclei…"
"You're amazing."
"You sit here spouting off about genetics, but you don't know how to use a fork…"
"Do you want my help or what?"
"Fine, ignore my compliment."
"So if that isn't in your DNA, it shouldn't be in hers. So her ears didn't come from you."
"Janice was part Mystic, a halfling if you would. Her kid's ears could have come from her, even though Janice didn't show them."
"Hmm… pointy ears must be a recessive trait…"
"So if she has mixed traits… get me a paper and something to write with."

Magus jumped up and went to one of the drawers, producing a pad of Sticky Notes and a ball point pen.

"What are these?"
"It's a pen and paper. Its not the same type of pen used in your world, its disposable… just write."
"Okay… capital T and lowercase t…"

She proceeded to draw a small table, a Punnett Square, with four boxes. On the top of the two boxes, she drew a T and a t…

"Okay, was there a family history of large ears in your lineage?"
"I can't be sure, I know that we didn't have big ears, but I can't say the same for my father's side…"
"You don't remember your father?"
"Do you remember my father?"
"We never met him."
"Neither did I."

Lucca looked forlornly at the table that she drew. So close!

"It's a plain guarantee that your dad didn't have these type of ears…"
"But there's no way of knowing for sure since these type of ears isn't dominant…"
"Exactly. You might have that trait in you without you knowing it, and you weren't born with the ears since plain ones are dominant. This leads us nowhere."

She ripped off the piece of paper and crumpled it in her hand, and dropped it on the floor.

"Next trait…"
"My hair."
"She doesn't have the same color as your hair… blue is your natural color, right?"
"I wouldn't change it for the world."
"And the hairline?"
"Had it forever."
"So you're stuck there…"

A loud knock came from the front door.

"Who would that be?"
"I'm not expecting any visitors…"
"It's probably the kid. Want me to go get it?"
"No, I'll go."

Magus left the table and made his way to the door. Opening it revealed Flea, alone, guitar in hand.

"What do you want?"
"Magus, the representatives we have from the underground have confirmed a state of unrest among the Mystics. After discussion, they traced it back to two reasons. Broken nails, and bad music."
"And what do you want me to do about it?"
"All they play on the Media Crystal are stupid boy bands and white rock rap. The people need real sound."
"I finished with all of you when our last show was ruined!"
"I'm not asking you to play! I'm not asking anybody to play! I'm doing it myself!"
"You're going solo?"
"Yeah. I decided its time that the Mystics had something worthwhile to listen to. I'm thinking something along the lines of Van Halen."
"Hmm. Not a bad choice… but what are you bothering me for?"
"I need to know if you have any spare equipment… any connectors, microphones, anything you're looking to get rid of."
"Fine… come in… but if you touch anything, I'll murder you. Understand?"

Flea, disgruntled, tromped inside behind Magus, and followed him into the kitchen.

"What are YOU doing here?"
"Mind your business, four eyes!"
"Don't say a word to her, Flea." Said Magus, as he began to make his way up the stairs to his room.

After Magus left, Flea let out a discontent sigh. He removed the ties holding his hair in place and let its waves fall over his shoulder. Lucca stared at Flea's bronze colored locks.

"You have roots showing."
"I know… my stupid natural color… I'll have to die it again."
"Hmm… I didn't know you died your hair…"
"What, you think colors this pretty come naturally? Just how stupid are you?"
"Stupid? I don't think so."
"Stupid, and very unfashionable. Where on earth did you get that horrendous outfit? Even that disgusting orange color was better than what you're wearing now, and that sent me into epileptic seizures…"
"Oh please… you and your little white and bronze outfit… what did you do? Make your tights out of steel wool and leave them out in the rain to rust?"
"Steel doesn't rust, you brainless bimbo!"
"Quiet up, you jiggling juggernaut!"

Flea grunted in anger, ignoring Lucca's final comment. Lucca decided to switch on the nearby Media Crystal, to see if there was something worth watching on. Switching the channels around, Lucca landed on the movie Wayne's World. Eventually, Magus came back, with a small, beat up black box, and a tangled cord.

"This is what I have. Take it and go."

Flea shook out his hair and left.

"Look… he left a mess of his hair on the floor…"

Magus leaned down and picked up Flea's hairs, completely ignoring the mounds of broken pieces of various other objects on the ground.

"Back to business… now you know as well as I know that anybody can have a widow's peak. Its not the most common hairline but it still is around…"
"Lucca…" he examined the bronze colored hairs of Flea in his hands. Flea's hairs were thick… like dental floss…
"Yet another dead end. The doesn't prove you are the father, but it doesn't prove you aren't either."
"Lucca, look…"

He handed her one of Flea's bronze hairs.

"Shiny, well kept, very thick… bronze except for the roots. What about them?"

Magus produced the other hair he had previously found on the floor, after Crono and Glenn were returned to their human forms. Stretching it out, he handed it to Lucca.

"This is one of the girl's hairs."
"Look at Flea's roots."
"They're the same color…"
"She slept with Flea! Oh man… I'm getting nauseous… I think I'm gonna hurl…" Magus said, as the Media Crystal responded…

"I say puke. If you hurl and she comes back, she's yours. If you blow chunks and she bolts, then it was never meant to be."

Magus couldn't help but laugh.

"The perfect quote…"

Magus sat down, laughing, realizing that the quote was oh, so fitting to his situation…

"That's it. I'm just going to finish the Epoch… this is all the proof you need. My job is done."

Lucca stood and adjusted the black shirt to cover her shoulders better. She grabbed her belt off of the table and headed outside, while Magus watched her walk away, admiring her… sighing, he turned off the media crystal and let out one last snicker…

* * *

"Done… and… done!"

Lucca finished screwing in the last tiny piece that would hold the Infinite Improbability Drive in place. She took a small rag in her hand and wiped off her greasy fingers, and placed her screwdriver on the ground. She walked around the front of it and jumped into the cockpit, pressing a button to activate it. Success! It was running! Lucca pulled a lever at her side, to control lift. Success again! The Epoch lifted off of the ground and hovered a miniscule three feet off of the ground. Not powered enough for heavy flying, but certainly enough to get them home. Now, to test the time travel mechanism… Lucca grasped for the dial next to the steering wheel and turned it to 1000ad. After setting it, she pushed a blue button that was right under it. The Epoch began to rumble loudly, but then stopped. It didn't work.

"Damn it!"

Lucca turned off the machine and jumped out, sliding her hand along the minimally corroded exterior. She examined the insides yet again, but there was nothing wrong. After a careful study, she noted that the blue button was hooked straight into the Infinite Improbability Drive. Apparently, the Epoch could harness that improbable energy, and that was Belthasar's secret for making it jump time… but why wasn't it working? What was the secret?

"Hiya Lucca!"
"Hey, Marle…"
"Any success?"
"I got it off the ground. But nothing more."
"Aww man… that, like, so totally bites!"
"I said it totally bites."
"Okay, Marle. Rule number 1: Don't ever talk like that again. Rule number 2: Do not take after Alicia Silverstone!"
"Oh, don't get so totally wigged, Lucca! Girl, you have to get your groove on!"
"Marle… if you keep talking like that, I'm going to melt your lips shut. Say another word and I'll blast you. Okay?"
"What EVAH! Loser! Oh, and we did your clothes for you, but they gotta dry."
"Thanks, Mallrat… I mean Marle."

Marle turned and walked away to sit with Crono and Glenn, who were enjoying the sunny afternoon. Lucca walked around the Epoch, eyeing its enhanced technologies, the wiring, the power source… it was all perfect! Or it should have been… angry, Lucca banged her fist on the outside of the Epoch.

"Damn this blasted machine!"
"Relax… relax, that's your ticket home!" said Magus, approaching carefully.
"It's not working…"

Magus walked over and watched as Lucca rested her arms down on the Epoch and lowered her head in angst. A chance! Magus placed his hand on her shoulder, as if to comfort her…

"Back off, Magus. I still don't like you."
"Why? Why do you have to hate me so much? All I try to do is be friendly."
"I don't need you to be friendly. You get too friendly. Like the smooch when we were flying."
"I was just trying to help."
"What happened to the old, depressed, angry you, Magus? The one who always kept his mouth shut, whose purpose in life was to get revenge?"
"He realized some things in life are more important than just hatred."
"Well do me a favor and conjure up the old Magus! Go search for you sister or something and leave me alone!"

Magus was astounded at her nasty remark.

"That was harsh… you know if I knew where to look I'd be searching for her right now. I'd be away from this blinding castle, and with her. And I wouldn't have to deal with you pushing me away all the time, and it wouldn't kill me to be near you and have to have you treating me like dirt."
"Back off."

Magus turned and walked into the castle. Marle, sensing his angst, left Crono and Glenn and followed him.

* * *

"She said that?"
"That was way harsh."
"I know. That's what I said."
"She's probably just having a hard time with the Epoch, you know… girls can get really pissy sometimes."
"Oh, that's a real help for me…"
"Maybe you should go about her a different way. Be romantic."
"Oh, yeah, I'm really the romantic type. I can seduce any woman with my piercing eyes and powerful words. I'm as eloquent as I am handsome. Not in this lifetime…"
"Come on, Magus, you can be all of those things. And you are some of those things! I mean look at you. Tall, broad shouldered, muscular, good looking…"
"Don't lie to me…"
"Come on… why don't you conjure up some of that good old arrogance? A little self esteem never hurt anyone."
"Vanity is a waste of time…"
"Come on, Magus. Why don't you at least try it? Come on, try it out on me."
"Come on! Say to me what you wish you could say to her."
"I… I can't…"
"Magus… you already confessed to me what you really were, a big softie. And yes, your secret will always be safe with me. We're buddies now! So get up, come on! Try it!"

Sighing, Magus stood. Marle looked in straight in the eye and took his arm, and placed it around the small of her back.

"Pretend I'm her. Come on, just think it… I'm Lucca, you're you, talk to me."
"Lucca… uh…"
"No, no no! Be romantic! You've watched your share of flicks on the crystal. Do like one of those romance films. Come on!"

Breathing heavily, he shut his eyes and imagined her in his arms… her eyes, magnified through her glasses… her purple hairs swaying back and forth, falling over her ears… He pulled Marle closer to him, against his legs, and pressed hard against her…

"Lucca… my dearest Lucca… she, the beauty of the ages whom I hold within my grasp… she with the most beautiful face in the world… your gorgeous smile preys upon me, your lips like a vicious weapon, of which I ache to kiss… to feel the softness, the warmness of your tongue is ecstasy in a human form, a taste better than that of the foods made by the greatest gourmets… and your eyes, magnified tenfold by your rimmed glasses, revealing to me the beauty of those deep dark pools that lie past them, calling to me… calling… saying Magus… Magus… take me… kiss me… kiss me deeply… take me… take me… and make love to me… and my dearest Lucca, I will… I will take you in my arms and kiss you with a kiss deeper than that ever possible beyond the dreams of those with the wildest imaginations… and I will take you, into my arms and hold you… and I will, my Lucca… I will make love to you, and delve into you depths, deeper than any other ever could… and with even the most gentile thrusts, I will make you scream and beg for mercy… and make you scream and beg for more…"

Magus opened his eyes, as his lips were barely upon Marle's before he realized she was in a trance, barely breathing short breaths as she tried to keep herself steady, as she was bent backward over his arm, her lower portion pressed against his loins. She was barely able to stay alive as she spoke faintly.

"Oh… oh yeah…" she whispered softly. "…that'll work… oh yeah… that'll work…"

Her eyes crossed as she fell backward, unconscious. Magus felt a great relief after saying those words, although not to the intended… chuckling, he lifted Marle and placed her into the bed that Lucca had held before, and tucked her under the covers.

"Thanks for being my friend, Marle…"

Sighing, he placed a friendly hand on her cheek, and let her sleep, as he knew she hadn't slept in days. Then, Magus wondered… did he seduce her and make her faint, or did he seduce her and make her sleepy?


Hot diggity damn! Did you read that? Did I write that? I guess I did. So Magus really does have it for Lucca. Will his strange new emotions be revealed in this next and final chapter, or will they remain unresolved? And stay tuned, for in the next chapter, one real truth will make itself known, to the young girl who wanted revenge against her father… or at least, her assumed father…


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